i lost my family (but i'll always have one with you)
by emryses
Summary: After Seamus loses his parents, he learns how to rely on Dean for comfort. /for the lovely abs:)


**i lost my family (but i'll always have one with you)**

 **For** **Abs,** **for GGE. I hope you enjoy this Deamus friendship fic, my love :3 The rest of the prompts are at the bottom.**

 **Thank you so much to Liza and Laura for betaing! :3 You guys are stars! #puffloyalty :3**

 **Word Count without A/N's: 971**

* * *

 _(Shock.)_

That was the only emotion that was running through Seamus Finnigan's veins. At first, he didn't want to believe it. He wanted to think it was all a lie. And he did. At first, he denied it.

No one who dearly loved their parents wanted to hear the words: _your parents are dead._ He had been one to hear this via Potterwatch right before the Battle of Hogwarts, and it had been one of the reasons why he had fought as fiercely as he did. He first believed there had to be some honest mistake.

 _(It wasn't. He'd seen the bodies.)_

He'd taken both his parents' hands to hold. The hands were pale. The hands were cold. The hands were _dead._ He'd spent the whole year fearing for Dean's life, and once he thought everything was going to be fine - _this happened._

The funeral had taken place two weeks after the Battle of Hogwarts, at his home. He had wanted it to be a small affair, with only a handful of friends. He was an only child of only children. There was no family of his left, and the thought of living as an orphan was unimaginable.

But he would now have to do it, and for the first few weeks, he believed that it wasn't true. That one day they would just magically appear from the dead, to support him as they always had. He would tell Dean that that's what he believed, and his friend would always give him the same look of pity.

 _That was because they never did._

* * *

 _(Despair.)_

With a cigarette in hand, he sat on his porch, gazing towards the starry sky.

It had taken him a full month to realize his parents wouldn't come back, and by then he had spiralled into an almost complete depression.

He now lived alone in his childhood home. A handful of friends had offered to let him stay with them, but he had refused them all. Yes, his friends were good to him and have been through the entire loss. Yes, _Dean_ was especially good to him, but it wasn't a match for waking up to his mother making breakfast, or his father talking to a friend on the telephone.

He _wanted_ to get out of this slump, but at the same time he _couldn't._

All he knew was that he couldn't let anyone know about his new unhealthy habit.

* * *

 _(Different.)_

' _A vacation,'_ Dean had suggested. ' _A change in scenery.'_

At first he thought the idea was absolutely ridiculous. A vacation seemed to be one of the last things he needed.

He had reluctantly gone ahead with the idea. _It couldn't hurt, right?_ So he and his friend - _and secret crush -_ of eight years had both decided to pack their luggages and take a week getaway to France.

Currently, they were sitting in the balcony of a muggle hotel, letting the silence overtake them.

"I hate seeing you this way, Shay," Dean finally said solemnly, eyeing his friend. He had yet to tell him about the cigarettes, but something in him told him that Dean knew already.

 _He knew. He_ wanted _so desperately to change._ He wanted to accept this new change in his life, but he was definitely no Harry Potter. He couldn't stand watching happy families laugh and play anymore. Not when the war had completely torn his away from him. _That bloody war._

"I know," his voice was quiet. "I do, too. You're not going to like this, but I don't think this vacation was the best idea. All these _families_ down by the beach, it doesn't really help."

For a moment, Dean looked down, like he regretted the whole idea of bringing Seamus down to the beach in the first place.

"You tried," he supplied. "That's all that matters and is more than enough. Don't feel bad, Dean."

"We could go down to the beach," suggested Dean. "Sure, we're not like all those families. But in a way, aren't we our own?" He hesitated for a moment, as if wondering if what he said was the right thing to say.

"I know I really haven't been the best lately," sighed Seamus, looking at his friend, "But I don't want you to feel like you have to walk on bloody eggshells around me. Say what you want. I'll take it."

"No, you were right. I should've given you space -"

"Don't you _understand?"_ Seamus asked him through gritted teeth. "If you'd given me space, I'd most likely not have even stepped out of my house again in my life. I'm _thanking_ you for the attempts at pushing me along."

"So...we'll go to the beach together?" asked Dean hopefully.

"Let's do it, mate."

* * *

 _(Joy.)_

The roar of the waves could be heard as the pair of friends forgot all their troubles, letting the ocean water tickle at their feet.

"Feel a little better?" asked Dean.

"Much," was the reply. "Not entirely, but much."

"Always good to hear," said Dean, before pausing. "Do you remember how we met in first-year, Shay?"

Seamus chuckled softly. "How could I forget? I was hanging Quidditch posters on the corner of my bed. You looked at me and went, ' _what's Quidditch?'_ Most horrified I'd ever been at the time."

"You spent the whole night explaining Quidditch to me," said Dean, grinning a little. "And we've been inseparable ever since. Almost like a family."

"We _have_ been like a family, haven't we?" asked Seamus. Throughout all their years at Hogwarts, they had never once failed to be by each other's side.

"And I can't wait for us to continue, Shay. You'll _always_ have me," promised Dean fiercely.

Seamus smiled softly at that. Maybe one day, he'll heal from this change.

* * *

 **Also for-**

 **Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry Assignment # 6 - Transfiguration - Write about someone going through a change (minor or major, physically or mentally is completely up to you).**

 **Insane House Challenge - 859. (trait) Unstable**

 **365 Prompts Challenge - 322. (trait) Family-Orientated**

 **April Monthly House Challenge - (dialogue) "You're not going to like this."**

 **Easter Basket - Glue - Write about something/someone holding something/someone together**

 **Writing Club:**

 **Character Appreciation - 42. Making light of a situation**

 **Disney Challenge - Eeyore - Write a hurt/comfort fic.**

 **Amber's Attic - 3. We all have different reasons for forgetting to breathe.**

 **Showtime - 10. Bright New Day - write about being hopeful for the future.**

 **Count Your Buttons - (object) luggage**

* * *

 **Please R &R :)**

 **-Ana**


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